Saturday 17 November 2012

ZERO CONTACT


I sat and stared into space as I thought what her mother would have told her. And how she would said it. I pictured her sitting on the sofa, sobbing. Her mother, standing up, a broom in one hand; other on her hip. No. Too dramatic, I decided. More like a modern family. They would sit together. Her mom consoling her. Saying things like “These things happen....” and “These feelings will go away after a while...”
Those feelings may go away. But I sure ain’t going anywhere. I’m going to be around a while. (That being at least 70 years.) Are you going to avoid me for seventy years? No contact at all?
And why no contact? Because we are close? Because we understand each other so well? Because we share everything with each other? Be cause we chat late into the night? Because we say that we miss each other? Because your mom told you to stay away?
Last time I checked, this wasn’t Victorian England. And this was a free country. Can’t you hang out with your friend? So what if it’s a boy? “Izzat ka sawal hai” you say. Keep forcing her not to talk and she might just run away with him. I’m not saying that’s gonna happen every time, but it’s a possibility. A lot of good that will do for your “izzat”.
Lets imagine a situation; You’re a middle class, literate man/woman. You’re walking down the road and you see your friend’s son/daughter walking with another boy/girl. They are walking close to each other.
Questions:
1.      Why are you still looking?
2.      Why did you look at them in the first place? You like to look at teens?
3.      You have kids don’t you? That means you had SEX. They are just walking together.
4.      It’s not even your kid. Does your friend pay you to spy on their kid?
People who look at couples walking together on the street and think “Kiti vaya gele ahet”, well, it’s none of your damn business, thank you. And you’re not going to a trophy for talking about it behind backs.
And it’s not just me. Lot of boys and girls complain that they can’t spend time together outside the house just because people talk. It’s okay if people just talked. But they talk to their parents. Then comes the usual drama of he is not good for you. You are just 18; you have your life ahead of you. You might find someone better. Stay away from him.
Then the girl messages “We have to break contact. I am sorry.” Then the boy stares at the screen of his mobile. Unsure what to do, or feel.
As I stare at the wall, thinking about philosophy, I wait for that final message. I don’t know what i will feel after I get it. But I’m worried about her. Not me. Cause for me, a feeling is like the cold. After a while I don’t notice it’s there.
And it scares me.

-K4VI

Saturday 3 November 2012

DEAR GIRLS

A week ago, a friend came over to my place. After some laughs and a few beers, he told me with a straight face- “My girlfriend is the most beautiful girl I have ever known. And I am so lucky to be with her.” Okay. That’s not what he said. He told me that she is a crazy and irrational girl. And that she needed some counselling.
When a guy meets the girl of his dreams, its heaven for him. The day seems brighter, the night (too) seems brighter(cause the moon seems brighter), The deos seem more fragrant and maths start to seem easy. But then the God above says “That’s enough heaven for you boy.” And he turns off a switch. That’s when the girl takes out the hidden weapons from her arsenal.
She expects boys to know everything! Her likes, dislikes, moods, what she means, what she doesn’t mean, what she wants to say (but doesn’t), what she doesn’t want to say(but does), what she wants to do, what she wants you to do...this could go on for a while. Then she expects us to open doors for her (because she’s a girl. And chivalry is dead) and the next second she fights for equal rights for women. Babe, chivalry was prevalent in the society when women had no rights whatsoever. Choose one, either we open your doors, and you don’t get any rights; or you open your own doors and get equal rights.
Girls don’t say what they mean, and say what they don’t mean. Just because the boy is behaving like an ass doesn’t give you the right to manipulate him. They don’t know what they want from a guy and they don’t know what they don’t want. They expect guys to know that.
“I got hurted so bad because of you”. Or those who know English a little better say “You hurt me so bad” followed by “I cried all night.” I admit, when girls cry, boys get awkward. They don’t know what to do or say. The quickest way out of this situation is to do what the girl says. So, at the end, the girl gets what she says and the boy is happy the girl is not crying anymore.
She knows better. At least, she thinks that she does. Just being more emotional and sensitive doesn’t mean you know better. Boys are emotional and sensitive too. Not as much as girls, though. With boys, it’s more about logical decisions. Not about i just wasn’t feeling....or I felt that....
Then comes the sacrifice. She sacrifices a lot to be with the guy. No one ever knows what ‘a lot’ exactly is. Girls, if you sacrifice something for a guy, tell him. There is a good chance he’ll appreciate it.
Relationships deteriorate because the girl doesn’t tell what she feels, or thinks. I’m not saying it’s all her fault. The world as it is now refuses to slow down. Fall in love, get your heart broken, fall out of love.  Move on. Fall in love again. Is it really love that we fall into? Or is it the idea of love?
Girls don’t know what they want. But then again, no one does. Whats the fun in living life if we already know everything?

Sincerely,
Boys



K4VI